Today's Forecast:
There's a give and take going on with loved ones. This thing will work itself out.

:) i'm sure it will.




*i'm nt very happy recently. sometimes, it is better to bottle up certain things (i think) . i dn like feeling this way n i truly hope, tt i wld stop feeling this way soon - fer i dn think i can supress these emotions any longer.

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
5:52 PM;;

a lot of mixed up emotions recently. dont like to be affected so easily by every small thing but i cant seem to help it. rem doing sth during my self-awareness module today->write 20 sentences about u beginning with "i am". n i rem e word paranoid appearing thou it was "i am paranoid at times". i think tt sld be changed to "i am paranoid, period."

nique was surprised tt i put "i am very (very very) emotional". and i thought well ya maybe i dn appear tt way? i dont know. for ppl ard me hav always said n known tt i am hyper sensitive (actually sensitive is e word i was lookinf er :x) n emotional, a real emo-case lahs :x but sarah turned to us n said "YA wad she is!". hahs.. n i tink nique said sth along e lines tt i'm always doing stupid faces, being lame, etc, wher got emotional? and i thought, well maybe tts all an act? a facade? i am actually a deep thinker *gasp* ya i noe u're probably gg like "shirley knows how to think?!!!" haha.. 4get it, i'm being dumb.

at times i really dont know what i'm thinking too. *shrugs till my shoulders drop off

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
5:03 PM;;

My Horoscope
Today's Forecast:
Things are slowing down and you will have more time to enjoy quiet time at home.


hahaha.. saw this when i went in to check my frenstar. gosh. how untrue!

things are so NOT slowing down; they're picking up pace. n i haven enjoyed any time at home fer some time alr, much less "quiet time". i'm so so sooo tired each day. so busy. no time fer myself. sighs.

i hope it happens thou. (pouts)



*i cant get used to sch hrs still. i cant slp early, wake early or be on time fer sch :*( old habits die hard. a leopard never changes its spots. Shirley is never early fer lessons. and ching added "dog never changes its skin." wtf?! haha

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
3:54 PM;;

when my entry showed aft i published it, i felt like deleting it. i dont even noe y i talked so much in there. but i dint realli wan to delete my effort thou. hahs.

so i just had to post another entry over it. know, so like its not e last entry or sth? ok u're dam smart if u noe wad mean cuz i dunno what i meant either.


i'm mad. haha.. pictures up soon.

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
8:50 PM;;

was so certain i'm gg to blog so much stuffs whenever i think about it but sumhow each time when i come in here, i dont feel like doing so anymore.

maybe cuz i'm tired. maybe i hav way too much to say n i'm holding back. maybe i'm thinkin too much i dont know how to put 'em all down. maybe there are too mani personal things i cant let out here. maybe i'm too confused myself.. bout what i'm thinking.. tt its hard to put them in words in hopes tt they wld make sense. or maybe i'm just plain lazy.

GAHHH. so mani things gg thru my mind! gettin a headache.. sheesh.

sch's starting!! omg nooooooooooooooooooooooo! DREAD DREAD DREAD (do u realize tt e letters tt form dread are all near each other? ANYWAY)! i have barely begun my holiday n schs startin alr :*( i hope yr 2 wont be bad... n hope i get a nice childcare centre too. but 1 thing alr makes me kind of dread e start of yr 2---i wld be in a new block! no more blk 16 *BooHoos* no more being in canteen 2 forever. no more being near e sports complex. no more wonderful iced holicks n kickapoo n chicken rice n western food n peaceful canteen w music n being near e childcare n having ice cream over at e green patch. lols... another thing.. i'm gonna be startin sch as a *GASP* senior! no longer a freshie! lols.. Bee n yin joinin us in np too. :)

speakin of sch, we juz had cca fiesta ydae. had our performance then too.. all our hard work fer e dance.... paid off? sighs. i dn really think so. e performance kind of.. scuked. hais. wrong timing, fergettin steps? i felt horrible during & aft e performance. practiced so hard fer it den...practised e whole of wed thur n fri, slept n woke thinkin bout it but... i dn even dare to watch e video. sighs. its ok.

.......................................................................................

slacked ard with e usual ppl aft e performance.. n had a gabfest x) this time it dint feel so gd thou. learnt about some stuffs which i arent too happy about.

e same thing's been on my mind since then. i'm surprised at e behavior of some ppl. i think this person has got too vivid an imagination. imagining things tt dint happen at all. like pls, what history do i have with u? tt even seems it sld hav been common knowledge to both of us tt THATs e reason y we dont like each other? did i ever cross paths with u last time? n i doubt we have connections to same guys? thought long n hard n i cldnt think of sucha thing happening b4. i felt like i was gonna burst n talked to bee n ching today. bee told me of this 1 guy n i tell u if its true i wld LAUGH. LAUGH SO HARD my mouth wld break n drop into millions of pieces so u can play jigsaw puzzle.

1) i din keep contactin him thou i dn like him (for pete's sake, i dint even own his hp no.)
2) i seldom reply him thou he contacts me once in awhile using random numbers
3) i dint noe u.
4) much less noe u liked him (n u even liked him b4 he liked u. wow)
5) much much less tt he liked u back? (gees maybe tts e reason y he keeps tellin me he likes me, writes me poems n stuffs like tt. u noe, cuz he likes u! * sarcasm dripping)
6) i guess its alr common knowledge to mani tt i get turned off easily especially when i noe this person likes me but i dn harbour mutual feelings. i cant help feelin afraid of this person n start to ignore him? read this entry. just highlight e last paragraph to get my drift>

e list cld go on lahs. sheesh. i dn even noe y i'm botherin about this. its so secondary sch-y. but i juz cant help but wonder how u cld be so ... like you :/ saying such things behind my back n still pretending to be otherwise. i admit i'm still rather surprised tt u cld say such things (nt bout tt guy thingy THAT i am ultra surprised) thou i dint really show it n acted like ya, e feelings mutual. but tts not really. i dn realli dislike you. i juz dn like e way u behave sometimes but i dn feel tt way bout u like i cld go tell ppl n say "hey u noe actualli i dont like her."

i hate it tt i cant help thinkin about it even now. at 5am in e morning. i hate it tt you are making me feel this way. i haven really felt this way about a person since.. well.. since.. this other person in sec sch, lets call her F. i'm sure my gd frens all noe hu i'm talking about.

how silly i am. i feel like confronting you but i know i cant do tt. but oh, how silly! *laughs at myself* i'm trying to think of how i'm gonna behave ard u now tt i've known e truth. i doubt i can act as well as u. so i dont think i wld be as nice alr. when u come looking fer me, i dunno if i'll be there. i think i wld still be able to giv u a tight smile. yippe.

anyways, ppl are startin to c u fer hu u are.

i guess ppl can always tell wad kind of a person u are after a while. tts wad happened to F too.

i just hope, really hope, tt such ppl wldnt come into my life again.

.......................................................................

such a ridiculously long entry again. i wonder if it even makes sense. doesnt matter. tis' my last night of comp-ing till such hrs alr i guess.. i'm so gonna miss this long holiday.... this entry seems sad. i shall end on a happy note den? YAY i'm happy yes i am.




-dont noe y i'm thinking about it so much
-n i really question ur motives.

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
8:31 PM;;

its about 2am now-hav juz got home n bathed. its a loooong day fer me n sumhow, i was a victim of (bad?) circumstances :*(

my day was kinda ruined by e fact tt i had uncomfy footwear on (know tt when u feel uncomfy everything juz kind of scuks? lol) sighs. was juz feelin happy tis mornin cuz my new erm, slipper? (those nice gg out kind w/o heels la) has juz gotten comfy n doesnt hurt anymore n so on. n i can wear tt to sch when sch starts too (since its still so new)! den juz when we were alr late n rushing, cough-clumsy-cough peiyi-cough stepped on my slipper n... e strap broke!!

so we (i) had to stumble to a nearby shop and get a new one. wanted to get a plain slipper but e others said i sld get sth else so smart me decided on a pair of covered shoes. with pointed front. e SA told me i sld get this smaller size cuz e other too big n tt it will stretch n yada yada so i got it. n it hurt. BIG TIME. soon, i had blisters at e back of my foot n i cldnt walk w/o wincing. aft even longer, my toes in front hurt too. i so felt like crying when i struggled home juz now :*(

i realized i am very gd at grumbling. but i cant help it :*( it hurts like hell, well if hell hurts tt is. it hurts so much i want to use a pillow n hit e shoe like real hard. let it feel my pain! Muahahaha! now hus e mighty one?! sorry i'm gg crazy.


i went out w e nra peeps to e indoor stadium fer HOLLABACK CREW today!


ticket

went Bugis in e afternoon n cabbed down to e indoor stadium. e event was gd i guess.. especialli loved e don n drew part. they're like ultra cute cum lame la :*) n i dint noe tt they look like tt. i mean, i thot both of 'em looks like well, e black haired more chubby guy but ends up e other looks so different. blonde hair n all. i tried to find their picture on their website but failed so u guys imagine fer urselves loh. haha

there were 2 categories fer e Hollaback crew -above n below 17. we cheered fer Street Fusion (kind of like e main reason we're there cuz 1/2 **1 OR 2. not half DUH** of our seniors' inside) thou there seemed to be little fans fer them. lols. Street Fusion got 1st! yay! they even got best videographer n best singer/rapper! how cool :) this other team called se7en from NTU was great too. they got 2nd. yups... OH how cld i ferget! THE CLICK FIVE was there too!!! waited fer their appearance right from e start!!! sings:hey girl i wanna catch ur wave~~~ i was there zi4-high-ing with peiyi. (actualli if u high wif a fren u're not really ZI4 highing right? since u're nt highing alone wads. wad am i saying GAH) their stage was real far away from us since e middle space is fer e performers. so near, yet so far. lols

aft tt we went over to suntec fer diner at pastamania den we walked over to tt fountain place. being so mountain beetle n noob, i dint noe tt ppl actually walk in there, walk ard tt fountain 3 rounds n make a wish. so we tried. yay so fun! haha :x den, we left fer Esplanade. walked a whole lot :*( (screaming inside all along: MY FEET HURT LIKE HELL! I CANT TAKE IT! SOBS) grumbling on e outside. hahs...

den ard 12am we decided to go back n i realized i dint even noe how to go home. there were no buses/trains/nightriders fer me! e others all had ppl w them or at least knew wad bus they cld take home directli. called Brian fer help n luckily i cld take 1 NR to town n take another NR home since transfer is free. (felt so :*( when i found out i dint noe how i cld go home. i hate e feeling of being lost n alone or simply nt knowing wad to do)

doesnt matter. den yups, i boarded e buses finally n walked a distance home. theres another event tml.. e LEVIs competiton. e others r gg to watch but i doubt i'm gg. i'm too tired from all this gg out alr. i'm gg crazy. i need rest. shall go fer e finals!

till nxt time!



-n i need to get new shoes again. i hav alr shopped A LOT recentli but y does e list of things i need to buy never ends?

-sorry py :*( dint want u to feel guilty bout my shoes but i'm sure u felt tt way. we were both juz victims of circumstances :) cough-clumsy-cough. lovess

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
5:49 PM;;

gosh.. i have been SOOOO busy lately!!! fer god-knows-how-long i've been gg out everyday w/o stopping. n its like 1 day i go so mani diff places (i think my mind knows i have no more time fer such stuffs since schs startin soon so its tryin to make mi cram as much as i can in e remainin weeks left. lol)

just today, i went out with my mom n bro! my dad has to work so he cldnt join us.. was supposed to go pay respects (? or is it juz say "pray" ?) to my grandma ine mornin but as usual, i slept ard 6am n cldt wake up. so onli in e afternoon did we go out...

went town! walked ard happily (n bought another belt too ) with my mom n bro :) aft which, we went to tt famous chicken rice stall in Far East n ate our dinner. as our stomachs are all full n bloated (lols), we walked ard sumore. finally we decided it was time fer dessert! so yay, we walked over to wher-is-tt tangs? dere fer e Haagen Daz...................

n IT WAS NOT THERE! GAHHH. i was thinkin y recentli like neva notice it anymore but dint tink much of it.. n turns out it realli isnt there alr :*( my bro n i asked our frens n realized tt Raffles City was our next best choice. (however aft we ate e dessert my fren-hu-works-in-haagendaz told me theres another at Hilton hotel there? oh well. *shrugs)

ladeedahhh~ we train-ed to cityhall n walked up to raffles city. spotted Haagen Daz -YAY! my bro owes me Fondue fer a long time alr but i'm always not free or sick etc. so 3 of us went in n sat down! (on e chairs of cuz duh) there werent any booths n my bro n i were sad :*( so we asked to let us change to a booth when theres 1 available n we got e booth aft a short while. *cheers! lol.. there was this waiter my bro thot was super cute (he's a guy n no, my bro's nt gay) cuz he looked so heck-care n had this haiyo-so-sian-another-day-of-work face. haha.. he even approached my bro n said

waiter: erm hey.. ur watch wad brand huh?

bro: oh.. *shows him* dkny.

waiter: oh.. hehs.. thanks. very nice!

haha.. cute rights. aft waitin a looong time (n my mom askin e waiter "eh why so long? haha), our fondue arrvied!

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.



tadah! fondueee

doesnt it look soo appetizing?


strawberry dipped in chocolate!

now tt i look at it, e shape of tt strawberry is weird :*( looks awfully long doesnt it? n pls what r u thinking? (haha)



choco waffle stick plus melted chocolate, chocolate ice cream n some (erm 2) nuts. yummm~

how i love tt melted chocolate. take away e strawberry syrup n juz give me a whole tub of chocolate! i dn mind!


happy us :) **i mean e 3 of us la. i doubt u wld be v.happy if u r the fondue n u are gonna be eaten :*( sniffs.

doesnt my mom look cute? haha

den i decided to photowhore myself. i sumhow failed (i managed to take my own picture yes but tt strawberry-on-a-stick cldnt be seen at all. n hu says i have bad photography skills?)


happy me

my mom's jealous and wants to photowhore with me too.


hehs. lovess


cant get enuff of that? one last glance :*(

yummy!


old habits die hard.

i'm always playin ard with food n i cant help it :*(

aft e fondue, we went back. (n my kor went out to geylang fer supper (?!gawds) w his frens. Dang. guys) what a nice day... if only my dad went too. tt wld be e best.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

e other day i mentioned i made sth fer my family right?

this is it:

family portrait :)


eh! this requires A LOT of time n thinking alright! i had to think of how to do it, wad to use, get e items i need, measure measure cut cut glue glue draw draw color color to achieve e end result. (wads w e double word thingy) planned to do tis fer a loong time alr when i realized we dn realli gave a nice photo of all 4 of us aft we grew up :*( but its ok! now we have it! seriously it was really hard to do but it was all worth it *smiles :)

i did sth wrong, thou. e stand thingy was to short so e frame stands rather straight n nt so tilted enuff.


sideview

haha.. doesnt matter. its still in display in e living room now!


i actually posted in pictures of bee n some other ones but i think e entry's rather long alr. so i shall blog bout those another time n let this entry be all about my family :*)


its real tiring gg out so much like that... n i slp so little.. but its fun at least.. neh. i w'ld rather this den rot at home everyday i guess. just... i'm sorry to some of u guys... for always being busy when u guys ask mi out or simply msg me n i fail to reply. esp ppl like my poly frens or pri sch frens? yup... forgive me! lols...

thats it! i love my family!


(n my brother said, "i was telling my frens whos e luckiest person now tt i'm single n i was like 'my sis' cause i now hav xtra cash to spend on her-buy her clothes and all" so i said, "who better than to spend ur $ on besides ur family?" hahaha)

-btw sorry if my mtv scared u when u open my blog in e middle of e night n u hear screaming :*(

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
4:06 PM;;

i'm tired. :*(

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
6:35 PM;;

went out with my dearest mummy today (like duh i only have 1 mom) i really enjoyed myself :*)

she needed to get some stuffs n i was free so i go with her lohs.. initially we juz wanted to go to the bank at yew tee to make a new atm card since i lost my other one.. aft draggin myself out of bed n gettin there thru all tt nasty rain, we found out tt... IT WAS UNDER RENOVATION! gahhhhh *scowls* we had nothing to do at yew tee so ladeedah i went to cut my hair. e lady-hair-cuter (haha) was real nice :)

aft tt just went walk walk with mom.. bought quite some stuffs.. fun but tiring ars.. on our way back we decided to buy durians! i keep having craving fer 'em ever since my chinatown visit! both of us dint noe how to choose durians so we wanted to just anyhow buy like 2 fer 10bucks (2packets la not 2 little yellow balls of flesh) or sth.. den uncle sumhow like c my mom b4 or sth (u noe e way ppl go "eh u look like...." den they go "oh ya!" n they start to hit it off real well n bcome bosson buddies or sth. kidding) n e uncle said "aiya i choose gd ones fer u! not nice u come back find me!" n proceeded to take those tt read "D24 $15 each" GAHHH. well i think tts expensive. we're not some durain xpert hu knows e diff when u giv us top quality n medium quality durains-i think. but he said cuz he know my mom n such he will charge us 2 packets 20bucks! -.-" so ok loh. i think they taste... ok nia :*( later eat some more. lols

just on tue i went shopping with my bro too. went town in e evening. haha.. apparentli he woke up ard 2pm but his clock was spoilt n it read 9am. so happily he went to DOTA n thought it was still early. turns out it was kinda late alr so we left late. there wasnt a lot of ppl in town fer it was a tuesday night so it was quite nice :*) i hate crowds esp secondary sch students-i dont noe y but ya i don like lahhh. it was my 1st time stepping into SUBWAY. haha.. cuz everytime i c WAH ALL VEGGY so i refused to step in. he made mi try a bite of his food (thou i bought sth else to eat there) n surprisingly, it wasnt bad! so now i got a new alternative n if ppl wants to go subway i can say "oh ok sure *smiles" YAY. oh n he bought mi a really nice t shirt :*)) aft tt he had to go back to camp so i took e train j.e via woodlands wif him lohs.

its nice gg out with family huh... n real nice tt sumhow u dn realli need to spend any $. haha.. suddenli rem this thing *scowls again* i cabbed home with mom juz now n e taxi driver took an exceptionaly long route! like a route tt doesnt make sense n all. when he cld turn at 1 place he dn wan, 2nd part he still dn wan ends up he go further from our destination, gets into a lil jam den he finally turns along teck whye to our hse. ar.. think u're blur.

there:


route

obviously, he sld have taken e shorter n most sensible route 1 or at least 2 but no, he took 3! c e bluish/purple thingy, tts e lil jam he caught us in. grrr...

(ya e yellow box is us in e cab n hu says i cant draw?)


ok lahs. this thing is crabby. haha.. yups it was real nice gg out with my family.. i'm doing sth fer 'em... hope they like it :*)

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
4:33 PM;;

i haven been blogging fer some time again... but whats there fer mi to really blog about? happy n fun things tt haven taken place? frustrating/sad things tt i feel like ranting here?

e latter, i realized tt sometimes, i dn really wish to share it out here. certain things tt cause negative feelings in me are not really appropriate to be put out here to the public n i guess are better left in my personal diary. this made me think of a line i juz read in a novel "everybody has secrets. you never really know anybody." i find tt somewhat true i guess? u cld act nonchalant n say tt the whole world is happy. everybody loves everybody;there are no secrets btw buddies! but deep down u know its not true. its never the case. or maybe i'm just paranoid. whichever way, i guess its better to act nonchalant to it all..

haha.. i thot of sth lame. thou totally out of point lahs... when i read "act nonchalant to it all", sumhow it had a tune to it... like "drop it like its hot" so.....

When a pimp's in the crib ma
Drop it like it's hot
Drop it like it's hot
Drop it like it's hot

When the pigs try to get at ya
Park it like it's hot
Park it like it's hot
Park it like it's hot

And if a nigga get a attitude
Pop it like it's hot
Pop it like it's hot
Pop it like it's hot

=

When u feel so alone girl
(act) nonchalant to it all
nonchalant to it all
nonchalant to it all


oh gosh. why am i typing sucha stupid thing? i almost wanted to continue e 3 verses la. i wanted to add sth like "when u feel paranoid ya, (act) nonchalant to it allx3" it doesnt even make sense. now i dunno whether i sld put this post up. its so lame i'm afraid u wld choke on ur mouse accidentally when reading it. (sort of like ppl choking on water when ppl tell them sth shocking?)

lets c, b4 this i was talkin bout... oh ya. den fer e former, which was about blogging erm, about happy n fun things? again, i rem another line from a novel or sth. "i'd rather live e great American novel than write it" so, ya.... n i realized too that i am real long winded when blogging n sumhow a realli fun day might turn out not as fun when i blog about it? (cuz u get tired juz by lookin at all e words jumping ard e purple screen) i tried to blog shorter but i think certain funny things are e things tt are in detail... craps. i'm so bored i'm trying to reason with a computer.


sheesh, i think i shall just stop this whatever-you-call-it entry. till nxt time'

her
THOUGHTS
EVOKED
5:07 PM;;